Thursday, 18 October 2007
Cool breeze lushing against my face with a tinge of ray up in the clouds... ...
Running through the tracks with the song "You're my all in all" in my mp3, i lost track of my targeted 8 rounds... ...
I ran endlessly without effort with hundreds of thots runnning endlessly in my head...
Hundred of thots ran through my then cobbed-webbed and now cleared mind...
My jog ended when all thots become coherent.
I prayed last nite and felt so compelled to msg this bro-in-christ whom i really can't be bothered and non chalant for some time and pushed him to the duties of his leader...
But i still msged him...
My thoughts were triggered when a bro-in-christ replied me "I love God"...
And, i wondered for some time when i saw that reply from him.
I wonder...and really wondered at that phrase....
I cannot and really cannot understand....
And we exchanged about 10plus mgses...
How can someone say he love someone when his ways are not doing so...
How can someone say he love someone when he's not turning to HIM for help...
How can someone say he love someone when he's no longer sitting near that person...
I paused and wondered... ...
If you love that someone, you will be able to feel HIS pain and heart ache of losing you to the pits
If you love that someone, you will do sumthing to reduce HIS tears
It brought me back to my convsersation wif a fren last nite...
Her mum teared as she saw her crying in her room...
Her mum teared when she saw her in her pits...
Her mum teared b'cos her heart aches for her...
My mum teared when i cried like ever before...
My mum never said a single word when i told her i needed a breakaway...
My mum paid for my trip in advance without a word...
My mum felt the pain for me as she saw me teared silently in my room...
Wouldn't your heart ache if u see the child that u painstakingly brought up is no longer smiling and happy?
Woudn't your heart ache if once-happy child who has been walking right and turned left in despair?
I realised...
The greatest of ALL is... ..... 
Such a simple phrase yet how many of us truly understand this?
It took me some time to fully comprehend this statement too
The BIG GUY up there is like a parent to me...
He tears when he sees me walking in another way in despair...
He will be happy if he sees me smiling in the other route...
Think about it...
At the end of the day, we still go home
We wanna avoid all comments, but we still go home
Even if we dun feel like talking to anyone at home, we still go home
We turn to our frenz for advice, ultimately we still go home
And, why? WHY do we still go home?
It's bcos there's this unexplained attraction to pull us back home.
That's bcos of the love at home.
The same goes for me...
when i'm in slum, THE BIG GUY stretches his hand n reaches out to me...
But if i do not extend my hand to him, HE will be disappointed just like my mummy!
HE tears and kept silent bcos HIS heart is broken.
HE thot our heart was wif HIM, but at the end of the day, HE realised HE was wrong.
HE will not say a single word if HE sees us happy and confident...
BUT HIS tears rolls down his cheeks when HE sees us being lost and no longer having dat smile on our faces.
Really praying that my bro-in-christ will not allow himself to sunk deeper ito his pits.
I understand it is not easy...
BUT, all i know...
instead of standing in the dark sunken pit...
Might as well stand in the pit and pray that someone will walk past and take him out of the hallow pit?
unless there's other small holes to wriggle out in the pit...
I'll still be happy for U too!